me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
Randomize
