Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Randomize
