Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize
