I smell stomach acid.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize