Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize
