You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
Randomize