Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Randomize