it wasn't lemon gatorade
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Randomize
