She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
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