ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
