I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Randomize
