She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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