Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
