I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
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