it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
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