Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Randomize
