So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
Randomize
