i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
Randomize
