Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
Randomize
