just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
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