how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
