Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
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