Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
