no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
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