how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Randomize
