I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Randomize
