Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Randomize
