So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
Randomize
