He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Randomize