OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
