whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Telling her that my penis is called megatron was not a good idea for a first date.
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
