At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
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