and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
Semen is not good for contacts.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
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