8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
So vagazzling was a success
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