i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
