I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
Randomize
