she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Randomize
