Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
