Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize
