its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
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