This dress was meant to end up on your floor
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
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