well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Randomize