I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
Randomize
