That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Randomize
