And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
