so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
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