people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize
