dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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