if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
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