And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
